A Police Escort for School Pride

Sept 2011

Once there was a little girl who loved school. She loved the pointy pencils. She loved standing in line and riding the bus. But the little girl developed a problem: school stressed her out. The bright eyed little girl with all the answers was a wreck.

I kept thinking it was a phase. Kids change, and anyway, institutions will do that to you, but we all survived right? I kept saying, "public school was good enough for me..." I was comforted when I visited her school by the happy atmosphere and nice teachers. My comfort was short lived, however, when a surly dark faced Alli came home from school and slammed her door shut. Was this the same girl who used to erupt into uncontrollable giggles at dinner and run screaming through the house?

I decided to apply to a few charter schools. Alli didn't get into a single one, but she was number 9 on the waiting list at a school called Renaissance Academy about twenty minutes across town. The Lottery director said Alli had a chance to get in, but it wasn't likely until the week school started.

Well, the first day of school came and went with no word. Then the director told me there was one slot opening up, but she would have to contact the 8 other candidates and each would have 5 days to decide. I did the math. That would take months.

Then, miracle of miracles, I got an e-mail on Saturday from the school. Alli had been going to her old school for five days at this point. The e-mail said that the following Mon they would award Alli a spot at Renaissance if I came in to sign some papers. I was a little confused, though, because they also sent the e-mail out to 300 other people...

Alli was upset at first but then decided that she would like to try the new school. Think of Maddie and Anne, I told her. Think what this will mean for them. She was scared but brave. Mon morning came. I got up, got Alli off to her old school, and called Renaissance to let them know I was coming over to sign the papers.

This is what the secretary told me: 'The waiting list is now dissolved. It's first come first served and whoever gets here first gets the spots available in all the grades.' And then: 'I think we've already had a couple of second grade moms come in this morning.' (It was 7:30 am by the way.)

This is when something deep inside me started raging for that lost little girl with the bright blue eyes on her first day of Kindergarten now two years past. I heard someone say once that you should try to keep the crazy in the bottle. Um, it got out. I threw Maddie and Anne into the car in their pj's without giving them breakfast. We're talking no shoes, bedhead, crusty faces... Not to mention my scary attire. Well the three of us headed off at top speed Cruella Deville style: you know, when she's got the white knuckles hunched over the steering wheel, teeth bared. That was me. I had to fix my kid and nothing was stopping me.

I got over to Lowe's and started heading up the road with the huge dip when, what do you know, a police car pulls out behind me, lights flashing. 'What the heck' I thought, froth flying from my rabid mouth, 'I'm only going 60 in a 35 zone! Damn speed traps.'

The police officer got calmly out of his car while I rolled my window down and started hanging out of it to shout at him, "I have to get to that school!" I start frantically pointing up the hill. "They're going to give her spot away, and it's her spot. I have to get over there!"

When the officer finally got to my window, I yelled: "You can give me a ticket, just do it at the school. I have to get there right now!"

Well, he laughed a little (can you say, future dinner table conversation?) and let me go. "Just slow down and be safe," he said. Ya, I sped right up again as soon as I was out of sight.

Once I got to the school, I lugged my bedraggled kids out of the car and marched into the school office. Now you have to picture this a minute: Here's a frumpy mom with no makeup and a gaggle of dirty shoeless kids charging up to the front desk asking about the second grade opening. I don't want to give it away, but the frumpy mom is about to start yelling and making a scene.

Okay, so back to the story. The nice secretary says cheerily, "That spot was filled earlier today. Sign here and she'll be number two on the waiting list!" She smiles like this is good news, at which point I had a total out of body experience. That little ball of rage inside exploded. Massively.

"No, no, no NO!" I shouted. "I was told I would be contacted when the spot came open. Then you contacted me. Now you're saying it was anyone's spot? This isn't right!" My fist came down on the desk after every few words to emphasize my point. As if that was necessary.

I guess it's true that the squeaky wheel gets the grease. I shouldn't know that because I'm ALWAYS polite, even to strangers selling stuff over the phone. The principal came out and quickly ushered us into his office to "talk". I don't think he wanted the homeless people scaring off any students.

He made small talk with me while the director lady pushed some papers around for an eternity. Then he went into her office while I waited. Then he came back. More niceties, and he was off to her office again. I was there with my sticky kids for an hour while Alli's fate was being decided.

Finally, he came back with the verdict. There was another seat. Someone else was offered the spot five days before. If they didn't call by the end of the day, it was Alli's.

Oh, joy! I was so happy. We drove home (very slowly) in triumph, gave a nice wave to the police car waiting for another sucker, I mean enforcing the law, and finally had breakfast. No more crazy. I stuffed it right back in the bottle where it belongs.

Alli did get that spot. She actually started the very next day, and we haven't looked back. The bright eyed girl with the pencil sharpener is back, and every day she tells me about her new adventures. She's made so many friends and learned all about a bunch of cool stuff. Just yesterday they made a model of a plant using candy and the info they'd studied all week about seeds and stamens etc. She ate it before I got to see it, but I guess there was a gumdrop seed that they pushed down into pudding and topped with a twizzler and other candy pieces. I don't know where they come up with this stuff. Another day she got in the car with a Japanese sand garden she was raking with a plastic fork.

All I know is that I made it happen. And probably the Lord. I don't know if he approved of my methods, but I could feel him supporting me. And after all these months at this treasure of a school, we are starting to plan for Maddie to go in the fall. I can't wait to watch her learn and grow like Alli has. Sometimes life is really, really good.

Alli's Baptism

Alli's Baptism went off without any drama, which is possibly a first... She looked beautiful and had lots of grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends there to support her on her big day. She looked so grown up in her white dress, and I told her the next time I help her into a white dress it will be for her wedding. I even made a mini wedding-ish video with pictures of her as she's grown up these past 8 years.

When I drove her to preschool over in Saratoga Springs, I used to play the Corinne Bailey Ray song for her Girl Put Your Records On, so that is the first song I put on the video. Alli used to love listening to that song and would sing it loud and proud all the way over to school. It makes me cry just remembering those little moments we experienced together that quickly fade away with time. It goes by so fast. Here's to another eight great years!Ty Baptized Alli and gave her a really sweet confirmation blessing. Afterwards we came back to our house for a little lunch and a lot of dessert. I made an ice cream bar with candy, hot fudge, brownies, and a dozen other toppings. That was so fun to put together that I'm racking my brain for another time when I just really need candy jars... I even put zebra tape on the waters because everything has to match, right? Ty thought this was totally insane, but it only took 10 minutes and gave me immeasurable enjoyment. Alli even got her hair put up (even those little short hairs at the back of her neck) for the first time in her life. Yes, that's right. She is such a stinker that she has never successfully gotten her hair all the way up, ever. My friend Konnie did this great act for me, which was so awesome. I figured if she was going to pitch a fit, at least she wouldn't be mad at me all day. In fact, she was a trooper and wasn't mad at all. She did say later, "it really did hurt, Mom," but I told her that we all make sacrifices in life! I believe the Chinese call it Mother Love. Anyway, it was a great day. I'm so proud of Alli. I'm lucky to have such a little firecracker in my life!

Christmas Letter

Merry Christmas!

Our family is grateful this year for the little things in life: pancakes on Saturday morning. A bubble bath. That Christmas Village puzzle from Ty’s Mom’s things. When we pay attention, we see goodness and life all around us.


Anne is two this month and so entertaining. When she first learned to talk she inserted a click in place of every k. So quack became, qua-click, and milk, mil-click. My sources tell me that Africans use the click in just this way! She’s a funny one and loves to tease, so one of the first sentences she learned was “gonna, gonna, get you!” We laugh with her every day.

After a close call with a cashew last month, Annie discovered the word “itchy.” Ty discovered the American Fork ER location as well(apparently it’s hard to find in a panic), and learned to say the words, “WAKE UP” loud enough to get some immediate medical attention after the nurse told him politely to “please be seated.” We had to say good-bye to Nutella and peanut butter at the house, but we’re so glad that Anne is safe. She kind of makes our day, so we want to keep her around.

I asked Maddie, who’s four this year, what she wanted for Christmas, and she told me solemnly: “My greatest wish is to watch Barbie and the Three Musketeers and to get an x-ray.” I told her x-rays cost too much because you have to break something first, although that’s a real possibility. She loves her gymnastics class so much that she’s always jumping and flipping off the furniture while I frown disapprovingly. She still believes she’s invincible, (and hopefully she stays that way).

Maddie starts Kindergarten next year, and she’s uber excited. She’s a small fry with a big soul, so I’m not worried for her. I know she’ll mother all those bigger kids who cry the first day and help them get adjusted. I don’t know where I’m going to find a uniform in a size 3T, but I’m pretty excited for her too.

As for my oldest, Alli is turning 8 in January and ready to be baptized! We were able to get her into a wonderful charter school called Renaissance Academy this fall, and she’s loving every minute. She’s done lots of crafts, from a Trojan horse hiding plastic army guys to a Japanese sand garden with a fork for a rake. I can’t wait to see what she comes home with next.

Alli is reading some fun books these days, and sometimes I can’t wait for my turn to read her
book. She talked me into reading Fablehaven with her and now it’s a race to see who finishes first. I read pretty fast, but she’s tough competition!

This Thanksgiving we had a really fun surprise with my cooking website. A neighbor pinned the chocolate chip cookie recipe on pinterest, and it was repined thousands of times. Our website hits soured into the tens of thousands. My friend Ashley and I are so excited to see what we can do in the coming year to build the site. That means a lot more trial recipes for my poor family. One night I made something new and Alli calmly pushed away her plate, saying, “It just tastes kind of like throw-up Mom.” My toughest critics are at home…

Ty, who’s one class away from his Masters, takes the fitness award this year. He ran 5 half-marathons in five months (he even did one in 1:23 minutes) and is training hard to run the Utah Valley Marathon in under 3:00 hours next June so he can qualify for the Boston Marathon. He’s so fast that he outran a rattlesnake on the trail up Provo Canyon this summer. He nearly stepped on it and lived to tell! The rest of us couldn’t outrun a turtle, so we’re very proud.

In June I tried to keep up with Ty by running Ragnar, a two day 12 man relay from Logan to Park City covering over a hundred miles. It sounds pretty grand but I had one of the easiest legs and still ran the slowest. Oh well, I had fun. (There is no Boston qualifying in my future.)

Until next year, thanks to all our family and friends for your love and support. We send our love to all of you and wish you a merry Christmas!

Love,
The Hansens

Sleepovers Beware

Last night I received quite a shock when I heard that the parents of the 5 Browns, Keith and Lisa Brown were in the hospital. It appears that they tried to commit suicide by driving their car off a cliff on the night of Valentine's Day. Apparently, earlier this month, Keith Brown was accused of two counts of FELONY child abuse dated from 1990 and 1997.

Let me see, 1990... I was 10 years old...That would be the very same year that Keith Brown was my PRIMARY TEACHER in Houston! That would be the same exact year that I used to SLEEP OVER at his house!

The whole idea of this is giving me the creeps big time. I'm doing a full body convulsion right this minute. Now, bear with me while I take a trip down memory lane... Keith Brown. He was the best primary teacher I ever had. He took a group of disrespectful, unruly 10 year olds hiding saucily behind chair forts at the beginning of class to the most well-mannered children all eagerly awaiting a turn to say the prayer. I can still remember the inspiring speech he gave us about the opportunity to pray. I cannot even count the number of times I have shared this touching moment to illustrate one point or another. Now it seems that there were other methods in play that I was unaware of...

Then our most beloved teacher was called into the BISHOPRIC, and we got a new teacher. But there were still the sleepovers with his daughters to look forward to... Oh. My. Gosh. Good thing I had my trusty guardian angels with me.

This just further emphasizes the point that you just never know about people, so it's better to let your kids sleep at home. That's right, no sleepovers in my family. I don't care how godly, there is no man alive that is going to have my kids sleeping at his house.

What a shame. I feel like another hero has been shot down, and I don't know how many men are left standing to take his place. I am really bummed about this.

The Masquerade Ball

Not just paper faces on parade, but little carefree girls dressed in feather boas, huge fake rubys, and masquerade masks they made themselves. This is what life is about: dancing like mad around the living room with all your friends to the sounds of Kidz Bop.
Then it was on to the fancy dinner on black-tie paper plates, complete with pizza and jell-o. That's about as fancy as my kids get. Even though I would have loved to make a picture perfect Martha-Stewart style kid meal, I knew it was a waste of my time. At least they had the plates...

The masquerade wasn't over yet, though. Next Alli put on her diva crown to open up some cool gifts and eat cake and junk food.

Why can't adults have parties like that? It was so fun, I almost wanted to be seven again. I'm still trying to figure out why feather boas are strictly for Kids and Vegas. They're "SO FLUFFY I'M GONNA DIE!" (That's from the Despicable Me movie they watched later on.) Yes, a masquerade was just the thing, and as always, I can't wait till my next party fix.

Well, "BOO" to you too.

Anne's favorite game has been Peek-a-Boo ever since she learned to see past her balled up baby fists into the wide world beyond. As she's aged, she's learned to participate. In her one year old mind it goes like this: Pull the blanket over your face. Giggle. Repeat.



So it isn't really surprising that her first word was "BOO." I was driving down the road the other day with Anne in the backseat all alone making baby noises. After a few minutes, I realized she wasn't making random noises anymore. She was saying "Bah" and then "ah-ha-ha" over and over. She was playing peek-a-boo with herself. She keeps doing it too, and she's getting better at prounouncing it. All day long I hear "Bhoo." Not "ma-ma" or "ball" or "mine." She's like a little puppy that just wants to play.



At almost fourteen months, she's finally learned to stand on her own two feet as well, which is encouraging. She's a long way from taking steps, but it's a start. She's so busy playing she forgot that baby's have a lot of work to do learning to do new things... Like every other member of this family, she's got a mind of her own.